I'm back again after almost three weeks of school! Dance has been eating most of my time and I've been pushing back my sleeping hours to ungodly wee hours of the morning (it's crazy). The mods have been okay so far, I guess, with Stats being the killer and Biz Ops being annoying.
Not sure if you guys have noticed, but I've been more down recently? In terms of emotions and all. I'm not sure what to make of it though, and I can't really pinpoint the reasons as to why life has just been depressing in general. Of course there are certain factors here and there weighing in my mind, but I'm not like a hundred percent sure that it's really because of those? Even from the way I type you can see that I'm so unsure about myself now and it feels so weird because it doesn't feel like I have control over my thoughts and emotions in general.
What on earth is happening????
I met up with Jade today for dinner though - and we chatted and caught up with each others' lives. Then it struck me that my hall life is really no what I envisioned it to be. Or what I wanted, for that matter. My roomie is now nonexistent, and the room feels so freaking large and empty it's insane. Remember how Wattpad stories used to always describe huge but empty houses? Yeah, that's the exact feeling that I have now. It's nice to have a lot of space for myself, sure - but it just feels way too big for one person and it's so empty and hollow I can't even bring myself to enjoy the unneeded space, you know?
For me, Uni life was supposed to be one of the most exciting periods of my life because I'd be able to meet people from all walks of life and actually stay in a dorm away from my parents and do things independently. But this doesn't seem to be the case now with assignments and lectures and the void of friendships and relationships that it's so difficult to enjoy this period. It feels like I'm fighting this battle alone and it scares me.
Not sure if this is a wise post to post, but yeah. Just my thoughts so far.
I'm back again after almost three weeks of school! Dance has been eating most of my time and I've been pushing back my sleeping hours to ungodly wee hours of the morning (it's crazy). The mods have been okay so far, I guess, with Stats being the killer and Biz Ops being annoying.
Not sure if you guys have noticed, but I've been more down recently? In terms of emotions and all. I'm not sure what to make of it though, and I can't really pinpoint the reasons as to why life has just been depressing in general. Of course there are certain factors here and there weighing in my mind, but I'm not like a hundred percent sure that it's really because of those? Even from the way I type you can see that I'm so unsure about myself now and it feels so weird because it doesn't feel like I have control over my thoughts and emotions in general.
What on earth is happening????
I met up with Jade today for dinner though - and we chatted and caught up with each others' lives. Then it struck me that my hall life is really no what I envisioned it to be. Or what I wanted, for that matter. My roomie is now nonexistent, and the room feels so freaking large and empty it's insane. Remember how Wattpad stories used to always describe huge but empty houses? Yeah, that's the exact feeling that I have now. It's nice to have a lot of space for myself, sure - but it just feels way too big for one person and it's so empty and hollow I can't even bring myself to enjoy the unneeded space, you know?
For me, Uni life was supposed to be one of the most exciting periods of my life because I'd be able to meet people from all walks of life and actually stay in a dorm away from my parents and do things independently. But this doesn't seem to be the case now with assignments and lectures and the void of friendships and relationships that it's so difficult to enjoy this period. It feels like I'm fighting this battle alone and it scares me.
Not sure if this is a wise post to post, but yeah. Just my thoughts so far.
Situated in the sunny island of Singapore, Jolene recently (is 2 years considered recent?) graduated from university and is now working in a job she never expected herself to hold. Besides having frequent quarter-life crises, she also indulges in video games, anime, and aesthetic korean girls documenting their life in vlogs.
Although not as eloquent with words, she still aims to try her best to bring across her thoughts to the Internet.
